It's kinda strange...

I find it slightly weird that ever since I've came back from Colorado..My passion to move..to have a place of my own has grown.

I'm honestly excited for the next step in my life..

and I've been looking at furniture and tools to help when I make that jump..

 This isn't the exact set I want..I actually really liked the one my grandma had cause I was able to change the bit and it had a counter and clockwise thing that if you click the top portion it'll turn only one way..kinda like a ratchet..LOL

I'm 26....EDITED 06/15/2014

I'm 26 today and I honestly feel sad..Don't get me wrong..I'm lucky..no blessed to have awesome people in my life..

 My co-workers surprised me with presents, pizza, party hat, and a cake..They made me feel so loved..but there's only one thing in my mind at the moment..

I should've learned my lesson the last time..when I got my heart broken 2 times since I've turned 25..but I don't..and I'm stupid..I wasn't even asking to have a relationship with this certain guy but I guess I gave that vibe?? Who knows..but he's definitely hurt me more than the other 2 boys..I even gave him souvenirs from my trip to CO..and I came back yesterday..still jet lagged drove to his house last night..and just put it in his mailbox..thinking maybe we'll be able to hang out soon for my birthday tomorrow..I get a message after I leave..also saying thanks..but also saying he's busy this weekend..but that's honestly too selfish for me to expect something out of this guy..

[[EDIT: Man, I must be getting old! 2 guys within this past year..year as in between now and when I turned 25! LOL I was reading this confused..and wondering what I was talking about..

Please keep in mind..I wrote this blog when I was upset..and wasn't thinking too clearly..]]

But that's what has been on my mind..
Yup. 26 years old today. And I'm stupid. I'm stupid! Sorry heart..You're broken again..

  So let's try learn this time around..it seems like you're doing it wrong..

the O-turn

*Looking at the U-turn sign* "Is there such thing as a O-turn?" "Yea...for stupid people!" 

Now every time I see a U-turn sign..I think of one of many strange but funny convos I've had with this certain fellow! LOL

 "Hey! You wanna go somewhere else other than here?" "Like where?" "Hmm..lets go to the beach!" "At night?" LOL

post it notes..from my heart

I did something I don't ever do..I left a post it note hidden amongst the pages of a notebook..
With how confusing you are..
How you're grouchy and then sweet the next..
A post it confession..

I'm taking a chance...will you with me?

I always say...

Everything happens for a reason..good or bad..

Life is like the ocean..unpredictable..at one moment the ocean is calm..then the next..waves bigger than ever can appear..

All you have to learn is to keep on swimming..in the calm or the waves..

Slightly off..and to be honest

Feeling: Slightly off



Lately I've been feeling slightly odd..a little more negative than normal..being a tad bit more sensitive..and quite honestly more vulnerable..


Its been one interesting weekend..and I've been so distracted with the chaos around me..I've forgotten how to look within myself to re-find my center..

I need to be alone..
I need time to myself..
and not worry about other people...

I do miss someone at the moment..

I do think about him quite often..I wonder if he thinks of me when he has the chance..A part of me wishes there wasn't this much distance..but I'm honestly somewhat used to it..if I did it before..I can definitely do it again..but it makes me wonder..What brought on this distance? 

Plus he doesnt need to worry about me hurting him..I'm not that kind of girl who plays games with your heart..

If I choose to like you..I chose you for a reason.

And right now I wish I was at the beach..but the weather sucks! 

 

The chase

Sometimes one wants the chase..To chase something elusive like a sunset..Never to possibly obtained..

I personally love this picture for many reasons..I was very fortunate to capture it and have it come out the way it did..I wish I could have a beach day like this again..It was such a fun adventure.

Don't let the darkness consume me..

Feeling: somewhat deep..

As of late I've been feeling very negative..kind of like a slow chaotic storm..all in my mind...some people would pay to see me like this..but whatevs..I dont quite care right now..

Normally it takes quite a bit for me to get to this state..and I'm not saying I have every right to act as such..I try to keep these things to a min..but there's some things you can't escape..

I just have to remember..

 That everything happens for a reason.

Enjoy the ride~

This song has been on repeat for weeks. LOL Listening to the lyrics..this is how I want to think everyday! 

If nothing comes easy as long as we're breathing
We'll go all the way or go home

'Cause if it's fast or slow
All I really know is I'm gonna enjoy the ride
And if it's hard or soft before we get off
I'm gonna enjoy the ride, enjoy the ride

Cause you should enjoy the ride..called life!



I want to think I cant believe I did or say that instead of I wish I did or say that! Live your life with no regrets!